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healingmirth
healingmirth: star and Christmas lights (star)
Have not watched the teen wolf movie, and will not, but:

Holland Roden is also in a Christmas movie with Tyler Hynes called "Time for Him to Come Home for Christmas" and they have maybe the fanficiest storyline Hallmark has ever produced, and I'm including the ones where there is secret royalty. It's delightful. (It's also a Mysteries channel movie, so there's more genuine angst than the main channel movies have. Still good, though.)

Also delightful, belatedly: Haul Out the Holly, starring Lacy Chabert and Wes Brown, with maybe the best supporting cast of wacky neighbors ever assembled for a made-for-tv film.
healingmirth: star and Christmas lights (star)
I forget what I was going to try to do next for this whole hallmark recap/review thing, but - this one's real good!

Cassie (Jen Lilley) is a writer who's just published a memoir, which she needs to promote. Her mother is a famous novelist and professor, her best friend owns a sweet coffee shop, and Cassie mostly has some realistic if frustrating issues believing in herself that drive much of the plot.

Elliott (Kevin McGarry) is a recently divorced author of a popular fantasy series, with good stage presence, self-deprecating charm, a great dog, and a fantastically supportive attitude towards Cassie, her writing, and her career.

Everyone's just really positive, and really helpful, and really nice, and fun. It's on again Sunday afternoon!

Oh, also! When Cassie visits her publisher's office early in the movie, the first book cover poster you see on the wall is Naomi Klein's book about the economic and political forces facing Puerto Rico post-Maria: The Battle For Paradise: Puerto Rico Takes on the Disaster Capitalists which is a great and bonkers piece of set design for a Hallmark movie.


(Also, I think the new Roswell on the CW might be great, help.)
healingmirth: star and Christmas lights (star)
Grace Garland (yes, really) is a Marine just off active duty in Afghanistan who's going to be an engineer of some sort in Cincinnati. She misses her search-and-rescue (and also explosive detection? sure.) dog. Named Christmas.

Joe Petersen is a small-town judge who lives on a farm with his dog, Justice. She crashes her new-used car into his fence because something on the car broke. Again, sure. Whatever. Non-threateningly handsome.

If this were airing on Lifetime, it would fully be a coin flip whether the dude whose farm she crashes into is going to be the love of her life or a serial killer. I get that you're a badass marine and also have just conked your head, lady, but yikes.

I would have had more to say about movies before actual Christmas if I hadn't been cringe-watching this one in 8 minute increments for the past week. What we have here is two people plus extended family who talk to everyone with depth and openness in a way that is probably great for maintaining healthy relationships, but personally makes me want to flee.

this one's short )

I fully only stuck with this because once I realized where it was going, I hoped the last 20 minutes would be good. The last 20 minutes were good! I genuinely believe that all these very nice characters will be very happy for the rest of their fictional lives.
healingmirth: star and Christmas lights (star)
Maddie loves shoes and somehow made a company out of that. Having sold the company and found herself completely rudderless, she is back home for Christmas, where she will (*gasp*) inevitably run into her high school sweetheart.

Carter is a woodworker/furniture shop manager who has made his home in the town where he and Maddie grew up, and is working for Maddie's family's business. The only things I like about him are his work ethic and his appropriate level of disregard for how important this imperiled high school dance is.



Aw, I love Christmas lights. The way they blink in a pattern.


This, friends, is the point where Homegrown Christmas broke me. It leads into a cute idea about a thing Maddie used to do as a kid which they IMMEDIATELY step all over. I can not get over how clumsy this movie is. How it is simultaneously over-written and under-written, sometimes within the space of 30 seconds.

Just. Y'all. Y'all. This movie is Not Good.

Read more... )

the verdict: 1 out of 5 candy canes. Maybe 1 out of 10 candy canes.

Candy canes instead of stars or snowflakes or everything else most of you voted for because I could sharpen it a point to poke the writer in the forehead if I ever meet them.

help.

Dec. 23rd, 2018 12:35 am
healingmirth: star and Christmas lights (star)
Poll #20987 help: I keep drafting hallmark movie reviews and then stashing them because the format seems incomplete
Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 11


which Christmas symbol should I use to rate these hallmark movies?

View Answers

trees
2 (18.2%)

snowflakes
5 (45.5%)

candles
0 (0.0%)

wreaths
2 (18.2%)

bells
1 (9.1%)

stockings
0 (0.0%)

other
1 (9.1%)